第754章 我家陛下不对劲！20
一秒记住【笔趣阁】
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【第十个月，你在皇宫里布置了大量探子，唯恐这里面再刷出什么伪人出来。】
【宫女丶太监丶侍卫丶御膳房采买丶太医院当值，每一个能接触到皇帝陛下的岗位，你都安插了至少两名眼线。】
【你不知道的是，因为这个缘故，皇帝陛下再也吃不到他爱吃的辣味毒药了。】
【除此之外，一切风平浪静。】
【皇宫副本似乎被你刷通关了。】
【你心里涌起一股不真实的成就感。两宫已清，朝堂已稳，剩下的就是好好治国了。】
【第十一个月，你认真治国。】
【秋粮入库的数字比去年又涨了一成半，各地新修的官道和水渠陆续竣工，三百名科举出身的年轻官员在各自岗位上干得热火朝天。】
【大魏欣欣向荣。】
【第十二个月，你如上次一般，在大魏年会上做总结报告，表达对皇帝陛下的耿耿忠心。】
【祭天仪式顺顺利利，你把述职册子念完，皇帝陛下说了句「可」，这一年就算翻过去了。】
【第二年，一月。你听闻南方某些州郡有叛军云集。】
【消息是从兵部递上来的，措辞含混，只说「南境数郡有乱民聚众滋事」，具体人数丶头目丶诉求一概语焉不详。】
【「叛军？这风调雨顺的，怎么会有叛军？朝廷里的那群老头又搞出什么我不知道的大事了？」】
【你捏着那份语焉不详的军报，第一反应是群臣又欺上瞒下丶激起了民愤。】
【你立刻做了两手工作。】
【第一，对朝廷里的老东西们重拳出击。】
【第二，立刻派亲信去查证此事。】
【密探骑快马南下，沿驿站换马不换人，日夜兼程。十天后，第一份详细情报摆上了你的案头。】
【然而密探回报说并非老登乱来。】
【这群叛军根本不知道是从哪里冒出来的，他们没有明确的诉求，没有统一的口号，没有像样的组织架构。】
【只是一味地搞破坏——烧粮仓，扒官道，劫驿站。】
【就好像一群专门设计出来的NPC一样。】
【没有背景故事，没有行为逻辑，唯一的存在意义就是在剧情需要的时候出来制造混乱。】
【最后一句是你自己的总结，不是探子的原话。】
【你连忙派人镇压。】
【兵部调了三卫禁军南下，领兵的将领是你亲自挑选的，忠心可靠，作战经验丰富。】
【你本以为最多一个月就能把这场叛乱摁下去。】
【然而效果并不显着，他们像滚雪球似的越滚越大。】
【每次禁军以为已经将叛军彻底击溃时，总会有新的叛军从不知道什么地方冒出来。】
【两个月下来，南方的局势不但没有好转，反而从三郡蔓延到了七郡。】
【你明白了这次世界毁灭的因果就在他们身上了。】
【这不是普通的农民起义，也不是藩王暗中策划的叛乱……这他娘的是剧情事件！】
【你决定下次模拟一定提前注意南方州郡的各种信息。】
【但现在还不是放弃的时候，你决定收集更多信息，以备下次模拟。】
【就算这次模拟注定要完蛋，你也要把叛军的底细摸得清清楚楚，下一次才能在他们还没坐大之前就按死。】
【于是你下令各级官府丶地方驻军丶巡检司丶驿站系统，将所有与叛军有关的信息全部整理上报。】
【终于，皇天不负有心人。】
【各种信息集合在一起，隐隐指向了礼部尚书。】
【你不理解，一个区区礼部尚书，怎么会跟叛军扯上关系。】
【礼部是六部里最没有实权的衙门，管的是祭祀丶礼仪丶科举丶外交这些虚头巴脑的事。】
【既没有兵权，也没有财权，连户部管着的官仓和兵部管着的军械库都摸不着边。】
【「这不符合逻辑！」你怒道。】
【而且根据情报来看，还不是简单的关系，是那种足以牵连九族的关系。】
【此时叛军已经到了城外一百里。】
【前锋已经拿下了京畿南边的最后一道关隘，最快后天就能兵临城下。】
【按理说此时正是你这个太师咬牙切齿丶背水一战的关头。】
【但你却没有这么做。】
【你没有去城墙上督战，没有去兵部召开紧急军议会，没有进宫向皇帝陛下请罪求援。】
【你选择带着五百个忠诚的甲士，包围了礼部尚书府邸。】
【五百人，披甲执锐，将李府前后左右围得水泄不通。】
【礼部尚书李无涯慌了。】
【他跌跌撞撞地从正厅里跑出来，看着满院子的甲士，嘴唇哆嗦了好几下才挤出话来：】
【「太师这是何意？老夫犯了何罪？」】
【你没有耍嘴皮子，用最直白丶最真实丶最不绕弯子丶最一针见血的方式，稳稳地接住了礼部尚书的疑问。】
【你直接打断了他的腿。】
【一棍子下去，李无涯整个人歪倒在地上，抱着断腿杀猪般地嚎叫。】
【然后你蹲下来，把棍子搁在他另一条完好的膝盖上，问他跟城外的叛军是什么关系。】
【礼部尚书泪流满面，表示不知道你在说什么。】
【他说他对大魏忠心耿耿，说他对太师从无不敬，说他跟叛军没有任何关系。】
【「老东西，骨头还挺硬？」】
【你叹了口气，挥了挥手。】
【聪明丶勇敢丶有力气的忠诚甲士们，举起了心爱的叉子，涌向了礼部尚书及其家人。】
【惨叫声此起彼伏，每个人都有一句话的机会。】
【李无涯的正妻被叉到墙角，尖叫着说她什么都不知道。】
【李无涯的嫡长子在书房里被叉出来，一边挣扎一边喊父亲救我。】
【李无涯的老母亲坐在佛堂里被叉倒时还在念阿弥陀佛。】
【可惜，他们都浪费了这宝贵的机会。】
【尽说些你不爱听的。】
【于是，这些人都被直接叉出去了。】
【嗯，叉出这个人世间去。】
【至于具体被叉到了哪个阴曹地府或者是别的什么地方，这就不归你管了。】
【甲士们只需要叉人就行了，作为太师，你需要考虑的就多了。】
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