第56章 心声吐槽
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第56章心声吐槽(第1/2页)
就在这剑拔弩张气氛之下，天幕画面毫无预兆地定格了！
就像一卷飞速转动的皮影戏，突然被一只无形的手按下了暂停键。
刘邦沉稳前行的身姿，项羽举着酒爵似笑非笑的神情，全部凝固成了一幅极其逼真、却又充满荒诞感的静止画面。
“？？？”
地上仰着头的人们，脑子一下子没转过弯来。
这正到关键时刻呢！
仙人怎么又把画给定住了？吊人胃口也不带这样的啊！
...
另一边，砀郡郊外。
刘季正蹲在溪边，就着冰冷的山涧水，胡乱抹了把脸。
连日逃亡和风餐露宿，让他本就有些不修边幅的面容更添憔悴。
天幕初现时，他也和弟兄们一样仰头看着，心里七上八下，直到那句带着磁性、又莫名耳熟到让他起鸡皮疙瘩的男声响起：
【我叫刘邦，是一个自带王者气质的男人。】
“？？？”
刘季缓缓抬头，脸上还挂着水珠，表情满是茫然。
幻听了？
这声音......怎么那么像自己喝高了在吹牛？
刘季猛地甩了甩头，试图把这荒谬的念头甩出去。
定是这些天躲官兵，精神太紧绷了。
然而——
画面依旧静止，但声音还在继续，甚至带上了点情绪起伏：
【就因为我靠着自己的本事，运气好那么一点点，先一步进了咸阳，约法三章得了点人心，想当上关中王......】
【我那位异父异母亲的好兄弟项羽，他就开始对我不爽了。】
刘季：“......”
话音刚落，已经有人忍不住噗嗤笑出声，又赶紧捂住嘴。
【不爽就不爽吧，他倒好，直接在鸿门摆了一道大宴！】
那男声陡然拔高，充满了后怕和控诉：【好家伙！那哪是吃饭啊？那架势！差点就让我沛县的老兄弟们吃上我的席了！】
（本章未完，请点击下一页继续阅读）第56章心声吐槽(第2/2页)
“噗——！”
这下，更多的人忍不住笑喷了。
短暂的寂静后，是各地爆发出的哄堂大笑和更加热烈的议论：
“哈哈哈！吃上我的席！沛公这话说的太实在了！”
“自带王者气质？这刘邦脸皮也挺厚啊！”
“仙人这法子妙啊！听着跟说书似的，可比干巴巴看热闹有趣多了！”
“快快！接着说啊！后来呢？席到底吃没吃上？”
天幕之下，原本因为鸿门宴紧张氛围而揪起的心，此刻竟奇异地松快了不少，取而代之的是对后续发生更加浓烈的好奇。
“大、大哥......”旁边传来樊哙结结巴巴，仿佛见了鬼似的声音，“你、你啥时候...跑那天上说话去了？”
刘季猛地扭头，只见以萧何为首，曹参、周勃、卢绾等一干老兄弟，全都围了过来。
个个脸上写满了不可思议，目光在他和天幕之间来回扫射，仿佛在确认眼前这个脏兮兮的刘季是不是个假货。
“......”
萧何素来沉稳，此刻也是瞳孔地震。
“沛公这、这绝非口技或腹语……声音，确是从九天之上传来，且与你一般无二。”
何止一般无二！
那语气里的小得意和欠扁样，除了刘季还能有谁？
曹参使劲揉了揉耳朵，又掐了自己大腿一把，疼得龇牙咧嘴：“不是梦，可真邪了门了！”
紧接着，天幕里刘邦的心声继续吐槽鸿门宴，差点让兄弟们吃上我的席。
天幕之下，刘季脸都绿了。
吃席？！
这破词能用在这么要命的地方吗？！
还有，仙人都这么说话的吗？！
然而，没等刘季从这诡异的心声吐槽中缓过神，天幕画面动了。
只见天幕上的自己，对着威风凛凛的项羽一个深揖，诚恳又怂地道：
“啊不敢不敢，我只不过是项将军麾下的一名小卒......”
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